Updated: Oct 29, 2019
Oh god, the pressure of discovering one's purpose! Everybody is saying "find your purpose." But how you ask?
Rest easy Love, but get ready for the hard truth. Discovering your purpose and living it isn't for the faint of heart. I won't lie to you, if it hasn't been revealed to you fully yet, hang on tight. You're about to go on a wild ride. But I have secret for you...I promise you it's fucking worth it if you get on board.
Here's the deal. Your life's purpose lives right inside of you. You can’t go looking for it, it’s not something you seek, it’s not something you buy or a degree you obtain. If you question where it is, than you’ve just been looking somewhere other than right inside yo own bad self! Often, in fact, it’s simply hidden from you "on purpose.” It is hidden by your cultural ideas and beliefs and programmings awaiting you to question and dismantle everything you thought you knew. It is hidden behind other people's beliefs and most often behind your belief that you are just one of the unlucky ones that didn't get a purpose this lifetime. It’s hidden behind your belief that your not smart enough, good enough or deserving enough. Deeper down it's hidden in your lifetime of pain and trauma. It’s hidden underneath the lies you tell yourself and will stay hidden until you truly decide to jump into the rabbit hole and uncover it.
But how do I do this you ask? Your purpose will be revealed to you when you become simply tired, tired of living an existence that you know is less than potent. It lies in your yearning to tell the truth and your desire to be heard. It lies in the omnipotent power that moves through you and as you. You will find it in those deep dark ugly parts of yourself you'd prefer to keep buried all to your lonesome self. You find it hidden in the lies you tell yourself and the shadows you hide from. You find it hidden beneath your need to please, to be loved, to be accepted. You find it hidden beneath the rock that says “don’t look here” and you look anyway. You definitely will find it inside of your binding pain and trauma. And if you think that you don’t have pain and trauma, then you haven’t found that rock yet, keep looking. You find it when you can no longer say “NO" to yourself. Without question, you will find it in the bold, garish and wild you! Absolutely, you will finally find it when you start speaking the uncomfortable and unpopular truth.
And Love, when you finally find it, you share the fuck out of it. You share it, like it’s a new lover that you have just met for the first time. You find it and scream at the top of your lungs and shout, “I’m in love and I don’t care who knows it.” You know you have found it when you no longer care about what you have to risk, what you have to change, what you need to let go of, and what you need to do to nurture it. You no longer care because this new found love of your purpose is beyond "you." It is no longer about YOU! It doesn't care if it makes zero or a million dollars, it simply must express itself by means of it's commanding nature. It is the unrestricted and almighty power of the infinite that takes over. All you had to do dear, was wade, swim, climb and finally say YES!
And when your purpose is revealed, after you have gone through the mud and the trenches, you will know you have finally found it because it feels like pure bliss. It is your reward for the all the work you have done and will continue to do. Your purpose feels like a warm shower on your body on a cold morning. If feels like silk on your naked skin and the union of a lover merging with you to cosmic bliss. It feels like the quick and delicate melt of a snowflake on your tongue and all the love of a deeply penetrated heart. It is pure pleasure and it moves you into desire for more and more. And you will know that you found your purpose because it will be relentless. It will wake you up in the middle of the night and will beckon you to write, to move, to take action, to share. It will become the dominating and commanding authority and you it's willing servant.
But here's the kicker, when you find it, savor it, like the sacred gift it is. Because without fail, you will have to turn those rocks again and you will find yourself wondering where your purpose went hiding. So remember the orgasmic bliss of the moment of discovery and know that if you touched it once, you WILL touch it again, it is yours forever if you choose.
Love, your purpose is you and you are your purpose. It was always and is always with you at every moment.